ARCHIVES : HILCHOS BEIN HAMETZORIM
HALACHOS OF THE THREE WEEKS,NINE DAYS AND TISHA B’AV
Originally written 2008. Revised 2013
Halachos for Thursday, June 20 , 2013
1) The twenty one day period between the 17th of Tamuz (the day the walls of Yerushalayim were breached) and the 9th of Av (the day the Bais HaMikdash was set afire) is known as "Bein Hametzorim, between the straits", a reference to their being between two significant calamities.
This time period is more commonly referred to simply as "the Three Weeks".
2) This solemn period in the Jewish calendar is a time for reflection of our relationship to one another, especially as it relates to "Sinas Chinam, baseless hatred", the sin that brought about the destruction of the Bais Hamikdash, the sin which the Talmud states is equal in severity to transgressing the three cardinal sins of idol worship, murder and sexual depravity.
(Talmud Yoma 9b)
The Netziv, HaRav Naftali Tzvi Yehuda Berlin (in Shu"t Mayshiv Davar Vol.1 Siman 44)
famously expounds upon this "baseless hatred" and explains that it was not just a hatred towards people for petty iniquities, rather it included a hatred for any Jew who practiced their "Avodas Hashem" in a different manner than them .
If one saw another Jew relying on a Halachic leniency which was accepted in that person's community, but wasn't relied upon in their own circles, instead of accepting that "Eilu V'Eilu Divrei Elokim Chaim" (See Talmud Eruvin 13b)
, that person was deemed a heretic and was baselessly hated to the point that people were attacked or even killed for being different!
(See the Teshuva at length where he bemoans the reality of this "Sinas Chinam", of not accepting different legitimate views or ways of serving Hashem , being "alive and well" and the cause of the Galus extending for so long, unfortunately. See also the Netziv's commentary on the Torah, Ha'amek Davar Bamidbar, 15:41, Vayikra 19:2 and Devarim 10:12)
All Jews who long for the arrival of Mashiach and the rebuilding of the Bais Hamikdash - and the Jewish nation- to its former glory, should try and rectify themselves during this period, especially in this crucial area of Sinas Chinam.
Halachos for Erev Shabbos Kodesh, June 21 , 2013
Double Portion L'Kavod Shabbos Kodesh
Halachos for Erev Shabbos Kodesh
1) Swimming in a pool or lake is permitted during the 'three weeks' until Rosh Chodesh Av, at which time it is customary to refrain from swimming until after Tisha B'Av.
2) When swimming in the 'three weeks' extra care should be taken to avoid dangerous activity as this time period is predisposed to Sakana, danger.
(See Halichos Shlomo; Bein Hametzorim Perek 14, Dvar Halacha 7)
Halachos for Shabbos Kodesh
1) Weddings are not celebrated for the duration of the 'three weeks'.
(See Rama Siman 551:2)
It is, however, permitted for a boy and a girl to become engaged for marriage during the entire 'three weeks', and they may even prepare a "Tenaim" or engagement Seudah, without music and dancing, until Rosh Chodesh Av.
(Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 19)
2) From Rosh Chodesh Av until after Tisha B'Av no engagement Seudah may be held, but a simple "Tenaim writing ceremony" with light refreshments may be served.
(Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 16. Care should be taken not to clap or sing too lively lest it lead to dancing which is forbidden. See Halichos Shlomo; Bein Hametzorim Perek 14, Dvar Halacha 6)
Halachos for Sunday, June 23, 2013
1) The Mishna (Ta'anis
26a) states "Mishenichnas Av M'Ma'atin B'Simcha, When [the month
of] Av enters we diminish [our expressions of] Simcha.
Some Poskim go so far as to
say that not only must we diminish our Simcha, we must refrain from it
altogether. (Mogen Avrohom based on the opinion of Tosefos, quoted in
Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 1)
2) Of course this does not
mean we should be despondent, as a Jew should never be despondent rather it
means we must feel the pain and sadness of the Churban, the destruction of
the holy temple, and do our part to try and hasten the Geulah.
While davening and
learning and during the performance of Mitzvos we are still obligated to do it
with Simcha. (See Halichos Shlomo; Bein Hametzorim Perek 14:Orchos
Halacha footnote 11 at length, where he writes that even on Tisha B'Av itself
we must be joyous with the knowledge of 'Ashreinu Mah Tov Chelkeinu', how
fortunate we are to belong to the Jewish nation etc.)
1) One who has a court case with a non-Jew should avoid it taking
place during the month of Av when our Mazel is weakened.(Shulchan Aruch
Siman 551:1 based on Talmud Ta'anis 29b)
2)The court case should be pushed off until Rosh Chodesh Elul or at
least until after Tisha B'Av (the optimal time, if possible, for such a court
case is in the month of Adar when our Mazel is strongest.)(See Talmud ibid.
and Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 2)
Halachos for Tuesday, June 25, 2013
1) We mentioned the Mishna (Ta'anis 26a) that
states "Mishenichnas Av M'Ma'atin B'Simcha, When [the month of] Av enters
we diminish [our expressions of] Simcha.
Until when does this diminishing Simcha continue, and at what point
to we begin increasing the Simcha?
The Mogen Avrohom (quoted in Mishna Berura Siman 551
S"K 2)maintains that the entire month of Av, until Rosh Chodesh Elul,
is a time for diminished Simcha.
The Korban Nesanel (Ta'anis Perek 4 os 5 based on his
understanding of the Zohar Parashas Yisro, quoted in Sha'ar HaTziyun Siman 551
Os 2) maintains that immediately after Tisha B'Av we once again start
increasing our Simcha.
2) The Chasam Sofer (in his commentary to the Shulchan Aruch
Siman 551:1) rules like the Korban Nesanel that the Simcha should only
diminish until right after Tisha B'Av passes, or at most until the 15th day
of Av, "Tu B'Av", a holiday, a day of Simcha unparalleled in the
Jewish calendar (as is stated in the very same Mishna Ta'anis
26b) which surely causes the sadness of "Bein Hametzorim" to
pass and the joy to once again begin anew.
He then writes, based on the Talmud Yerushalmi, that the month of
Av is actually split into two parts; from Rosh Chodesh until Tisha B'Av is
called Chodesh Av (and is the sad portion) and from after Tisha B'Av until Elul
is called Chodesh Meachem [Av] (and is the joyous part of the month).
Interestingly, when dating his Teshuvos (responsa), the Chasam
Sofer often followed the aforementioned formula, and many Teshuvos written
between Rosh Chodesh and Tisha B'Av were dated as written in
"Av" (e.g. Even HaEzer Siman 92) whereas many
written post Tisha B'Av were dated as written in "Menachem" (e.g.
Yoreh Deah Siman42) or as "Menachem Av" (e.g. Even
HaEzer Siman 95)
The prevalent custom amongst Klal Yisroel is to refer to the entire
month as "Menachem Av".
Halachos for Wednesday, June 26, 2013
1) severity of the
prohibitions of the 'three weeks' increase for the last 'nine days' from Rosh
Chodesh Menachem Av through Tisha B'Av, and increase even further for the
actual week in which Tisha B'Av falls. (See Shulchan Aruch Siman 551:
2 and 3)
During the nine days we do not eat meat or poultry, and we don't
drink wine. (See Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 58 and Aruch
HaShulchan Siman 551:24. This includes minors; See Mishna Berura S"K 70)
However, if someone is ill (this includes a mother of a newborn or
similarly ill individual) and meat will make them feel better, he/she may eat
meat. However, If possible, the ill person should abstain from meat from the
7th of Av (the day the idol worshippers entered the Heichal of the Bais
HaMikdash) until after Tisha B'Av.(See Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 61)
The prohibition against eating meat does not apply on Shabbos or at
a Seudas Mitzvah (e.g. Bris, Pidyon Haben, and Siyum on a tractate of Talmud) (Rama
Siman 551:10 and Mishna Berura S"K 73. We will discuss more details
pertaining to "Seudas Mitzvah" tomorrow B'Ezras Hashem)
2) There is a discussion in the Poskim whether one may eat leftover
meat and meat dishes from Shabbos on Motzaei Shabbos and Sunday. The prevalent
custom, based on the consensus of most contemporary Poskim is to be stringent
with this. (See Aruch Hashulchan Siman 551:24 and Birchei Yosef Siman
551:6 and Sha'arei Teshuva Siman 551 Os 29)
Regarding the cup of wine at Havdalah, according to many Poskim it
is best to have a child drink it (This child must be old enough to understand
that you are being Motzaei him with the Bracha of HaGafen but not too old that
he comprehends how to mourn the Churban, and thus cannot drink wine either. Rav
Shlomo Zalmen Auerbach Zatzal and other Poskim maintained that such a child is
hard to find and thus rule that it is always best to drink it yourself even if
a child is available). (See Rama Siman 551:10 and Mishna Berura
S"K 70)
If no child is available, the one who recited Havdalah may drink
it.(ibid.)
Halachos for Thursday, June 27, 2013
1) At a "Seudas Mitzvah" during the 'nine days' meat and
wine (during the meal as well as for Birchas Hamazon) is permitted.(Rama
Siman 551:10 and Mishna Berura S"K 72 and 75)
The allowance is not just for the one celebrating the
"Simcha" but also for his wife, children as well as for his friends
and any other man or woman who would otherwise have been invited to the meal
had it not been during the 'nine days' as well. (See Mishna Berura
S"K 73)
2) One who attends the Seudas Mitzvah just in order to eat meat and
drink wine, but has no particular closeness or friendship to the one making the
Simcha has transgressed a sin by eating meat or drinking wine. (Mogen
Avrohom in the name of the MaHaril, quoted in Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K
76)
Only while actually in attendance at the Seudas Mitzvah
is the meat and wine permitted; meat and wine sent from the Seudah to someone's
home is prohibited. (Mishna Berura S"K 75)
Once the actual week of Tisha B'Av arrives, only ten of the guests
(besides the ones making the Simcha) may eat meat and drink wine, while the
rest of the attendees must eat non-meat and wine items. (Rama ibid.
and Mishna Berura S"K 77)
Halachos for Erev Shabbos Kodesh, June 28, 2013
Halachos for Erev Shabos Kodesh
1) A meal in conjunction with a Siyum upon completing a Masechta
(tractate of Mishna or Talmud) is considered a Seudas Mitzvah and may
contain meat and wine when celebrated during the 'nine days'. (Rama
Siman 551:10)
2) If one would not otherwise have finished the Masechta he was
learning in time for a Siyum in the 'nine days' he should not increase or
decrease his speed of learning in order to have it "conveniently"
fall out in time for a meat meal in the 'nine days'.(Mishna Berura Siman
551 S"K 73)
Likewise, if one would usually not make a Siyum with a meal for
finishing whatever it is he finished, had it not been in the 'nine days', he
should not make it during the 'nine days' either. (ibid.)
Halachos for Shabbos Kodesh
1) Even those who did not finish the Masechta or even learn any
part of it together with the one making the Siyum, may participate in the meal
and partake of the meat and wine, provided that they would have participated in
the meal had it taken place at a different time of year as well. (ibid.
See also Biur Halacha Dibur Hamaschil V'Siyum Maseches where he brings a more
stringent opinion from Rav Yaakov Emden Zatzal regarding who may be on the
Siyum guest list during the 'nine days')
2) Like any Seudas Mitzvah, once the week of Tisha B'Av arrives,
only ten of the guests (besides the ones making the Siyum) may eat meat and
drink wine, while the rest of the attendees must eat non-meat and wine items. (Rama
ibid. and Mishna Berura S"K 77)
Halachos for Sunday, June 23, 2013
1) The Mishna (Ta'anis
26a) states "Mishenichnas Av M'Ma'atin B'Simcha, When [the month
of] Av enters we diminish [our expressions of] Simcha.
Some Poskim go so far as to
say that not only must we diminish our Simcha, we must refrain from it
altogether. (Mogen Avrohom based on the opinion of Tosefos, quoted in
Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 1)
2) Of course this does not
mean we should be despondent, as a Jew should never be despondent rather it
means we must feel the pain and sadness of the Churban, the destruction of
the holy temple, and do our part to try and hasten the Geulah.
While davening and
learning and during the performance of Mitzvos we are still obligated to do it
with Simcha. (See Halichos Shlomo; Bein Hametzorim Perek 14:Orchos
Halacha footnote 11 at length, where he writes that even on Tisha B'Av itself
we must be joyous with the knowledge of 'Ashreinu Mah Tov Chelkeinu', how
fortunate we are to belong to the Jewish nation etc.)
Halachos for Monday, June 24, 2013
1) One who has a court case with a non-Jew should avoid it taking
place during the month of Av when our Mazel is weakened.(Shulchan Aruch
Siman 551:1 based on Talmud Ta'anis 29b)
2)The court case should be pushed off until Rosh Chodesh Elul or at
least until after Tisha B'Av (the optimal time, if possible, for such a court
case is in the month of Adar when our Mazel is strongest.)(See Talmud ibid.
and Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 2)
Halachos for Tuesday, June 25, 2013
1) We mentioned the Mishna (Ta'anis 26a) that
states "Mishenichnas Av M'Ma'atin B'Simcha, When [the month of] Av enters
we diminish [our expressions of] Simcha.
Until when does this diminishing Simcha continue, and at what point
to we begin increasing the Simcha?
The Mogen Avrohom (quoted in Mishna Berura Siman 551
S"K 2)maintains that the entire month of Av, until Rosh Chodesh Elul,
is a time for diminished Simcha.
The Korban Nesanel (Ta'anis Perek 4 os 5 based on his
understanding of the Zohar Parashas Yisro, quoted in Sha'ar HaTziyun Siman 551
Os 2) maintains that immediately after Tisha B'Av we once again start
increasing our Simcha.
2) The Chasam Sofer (in his commentary to the Shulchan Aruch
Siman 551:1) rules like the Korban Nesanel that the Simcha should only
diminish until right after Tisha B'Av passes, or at most until the 15th day
of Av, "Tu B'Av", a holiday, a day of Simcha unparalleled in the
Jewish calendar (as is stated in the very same Mishna Ta'anis
26b) which surely causes the sadness of "Bein Hametzorim" to
pass and the joy to once again begin anew.
He then writes, based on the Talmud Yerushalmi, that the month of
Av is actually split into two parts; from Rosh Chodesh until Tisha B'Av is
called Chodesh Av (and is the sad portion) and from after Tisha B'Av until Elul
is called Chodesh Meachem [Av] (and is the joyous part of the month).
Interestingly, when dating his Teshuvos (responsa), the Chasam
Sofer often followed the aforementioned formula, and many Teshuvos written
between Rosh Chodesh and Tisha B'Av were dated as written in
"Av" (e.g. Even HaEzer Siman 92) whereas many
written post Tisha B'Av were dated as written in "Menachem" (e.g.
Yoreh Deah Siman42) or as "Menachem Av" (e.g. Even
HaEzer Siman 95)
The prevalent custom amongst Klal Yisroel is to refer to the entire
month as "Menachem Av".
Halachos for Wednesday, June 26, 2013
1) severity of the
prohibitions of the 'three weeks' increase for the last 'nine days' from Rosh
Chodesh Menachem Av through Tisha B'Av, and increase even further for the
actual week in which Tisha B'Av falls. (See Shulchan Aruch Siman 551:
2 and 3)
During the nine days we do not eat meat or poultry, and we don't
drink wine. (See Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 58 and Aruch
HaShulchan Siman 551:24. This includes minors; See Mishna Berura S"K 70)
However, if someone is ill (this includes a mother of a newborn or
similarly ill individual) and meat will make them feel better, he/she may eat
meat. However, If possible, the ill person should abstain from meat from the
7th of Av (the day the idol worshippers entered the Heichal of the Bais
HaMikdash) until after Tisha B'Av.(See Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K 61)
The prohibition against eating meat does not apply on Shabbos or at
a Seudas Mitzvah (e.g. Bris, Pidyon Haben, and Siyum on a tractate of Talmud) (Rama
Siman 551:10 and Mishna Berura S"K 73. We will discuss more details
pertaining to "Seudas Mitzvah" tomorrow B'Ezras Hashem)
2) There is a discussion in the Poskim whether one may eat leftover
meat and meat dishes from Shabbos on Motzaei Shabbos and Sunday. The prevalent
custom, based on the consensus of most contemporary Poskim is to be stringent
with this. (See Aruch Hashulchan Siman 551:24 and Birchei Yosef Siman
551:6 and Sha'arei Teshuva Siman 551 Os 29)
Regarding the cup of wine at Havdalah, according to many Poskim it
is best to have a child drink it (This child must be old enough to understand
that you are being Motzaei him with the Bracha of HaGafen but not too old that
he comprehends how to mourn the Churban, and thus cannot drink wine either. Rav
Shlomo Zalmen Auerbach Zatzal and other Poskim maintained that such a child is
hard to find and thus rule that it is always best to drink it yourself even if
a child is available). (See Rama Siman 551:10 and Mishna Berura
S"K 70)
If no child is available, the one who recited Havdalah may drink
it.(ibid.)
Halachos for Thursday, June 27, 2013
1) At a "Seudas Mitzvah" during the 'nine days' meat and
wine (during the meal as well as for Birchas Hamazon) is permitted.(Rama
Siman 551:10 and Mishna Berura S"K 72 and 75)
The allowance is not just for the one celebrating the
"Simcha" but also for his wife, children as well as for his friends
and any other man or woman who would otherwise have been invited to the meal
had it not been during the 'nine days' as well. (See Mishna Berura
S"K 73)
2) One who attends the Seudas Mitzvah just in order to eat meat and
drink wine, but has no particular closeness or friendship to the one making the
Simcha has transgressed a sin by eating meat or drinking wine. (Mogen
Avrohom in the name of the MaHaril, quoted in Mishna Berura Siman 551 S"K
76)
Only while actually in attendance at the Seudas Mitzvah
is the meat and wine permitted; meat and wine sent from the Seudah to someone's
home is prohibited. (Mishna Berura S"K 75)
Once the actual week of Tisha B'Av arrives, only ten of the guests
(besides the ones making the Simcha) may eat meat and drink wine, while the
rest of the attendees must eat non-meat and wine items. (Rama ibid.
and Mishna Berura S"K 77)
Halachos for Erev Shabbos Kodesh, June 28, 2013
(Double Portion L’Kavod Shabbos Kodesh)
Halachos for Erev Shabos Kodesh
1) A meal in conjunction with a Siyum upon completing a Masechta
(tractate of Mishna or Talmud) is considered a Seudas Mitzvah and may
contain meat and wine when celebrated during the 'nine days'. (Rama
Siman 551:10)
2) If one would not otherwise have finished the Masechta he was
learning in time for a Siyum in the 'nine days' he should not increase or
decrease his speed of learning in order to have it "conveniently"
fall out in time for a meat meal in the 'nine days'.(Mishna Berura Siman
551 S"K 73)
Likewise, if one would usually not make a Siyum with a meal for
finishing whatever it is he finished, had it not been in the 'nine days', he
should not make it during the 'nine days' either. (ibid.)
Halachos for Shabbos Kodesh
1) Even those who did not finish the Masechta or even learn any
part of it together with the one making the Siyum, may participate in the meal
and partake of the meat and wine, provided that they would have participated in
the meal had it taken place at a different time of year as well. (ibid.
See also Biur Halacha Dibur Hamaschil V'Siyum Maseches where he brings a more
stringent opinion from Rav Yaakov Emden Zatzal regarding who may be on the
Siyum guest list during the 'nine days')
2) Like any Seudas Mitzvah, once the week of Tisha B'Av arrives,
only ten of the guests (besides the ones making the Siyum) may eat meat and
drink wine, while the rest of the attendees must eat non-meat and wine items. (Rama
ibid. and Mishna Berura S"K 77)
